Tuesday, August 16, 2016

Pre-op Giddiness

I love pre-op questionnaires. They can be really fun. Here are some of the questions and my answers (or the answers I would give if I didn't have to worry about someone taking them seriously):

List all your surgeries:
I can't list all my surgeries on the space you give me, so I offer the unabridged version for the price of $10.

Who[m] do you live with?
wife, son, dog, cat, invisible friend Harvey the Rabbit.

Who[m] do you rely on for emotional support?
wife, son, dog, friends, [cat? Yeah, right.], invisible friend Harvey the Rabbit.

Does anyone rely on you for emotional support at home?
Wife, dog, ?teen son?, ?cat?

Would you like to see a social worker?
Depends on what they're wearing.

When you're a patient, I recommend doing this. It passes the time, and it entertains the staff. Just make sure they understand that Harvey is a joke.

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