Pre-op Follies

I went down to Ben and Jerry's Hospital early this morning for my pre-operative appointment in preparation for tomorrow's excitement. I was given a pre-op questionnaire and sat down in the waiting room. I was there for a while, and I got bored, so I decided to have a little fun and spice up my answers

Have any recent stress in your life?
Well, see, there's this tumor. . .

Date of last menstrual period?
Whose?

Does anyone at home depend on your care? 
Yes. Ben and the cat. Also the plants.


Over the past 2 weeks, have you felt down, depressed, or hopeless? 
Yes. Last week, I thought I was about to die. I'm a bit more optimistic now.

Would you like to see a social worker?
No, I'm married. But thanks. I might be able to find someone who would if you need.

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Okay, now for nap. I got up way too early!